r/wallstreetbets
SPCX: IPO of the century or a liquidity vampire with a PowerPoint
Author mocks the upcoming SPCX IPO, criticizing its $1.7T valuation despite negative profits and calling the founder a vampire.
- The company is unprofitable despite generating $18.7B in revenue.
- The $1.7 trillion valuation is absurd and lacks fundamental backing.
- The founder's controversial reputation makes it a risky investment.
Listen up, you smooth-brained regards.
We have a \\fElon Muskuito\\ about to drag his company onto the public markets like a raccoon carrying a stolen credit card. The company did \\$18.7B in revenue\\, which is cute, because it also managed to lose money in \\2025\\. That’s not a business model, that’s a bonfire with quarterly guidance.
And the CEO? Holy hell. This dude has the aura of a man who would ask for a loyalty pledge before handing you a napkin. The kind of guy who looks at a pension fund and thinks, “nice blood supply.” He’s not going public...he’s opening a vein and calling it growth.
AND NOW HE WANTS \\$1.7 TRILLION VALUATION\\.
Let that sink in.
$18.7B revenue.
Negative profits.
Vibes-based valuation at \\1.7T\\ like he’s asking retail to fund his entire ideological empire.
This IPO is basically a mosquito wearing a tie.
The pitch deck says “innovation.”
The balance sheet says “help.”
The founder says “sign here for $1.7T,” and somehow your portfolio ends up looking like a crime scene.
He’s not raising capital, he’s raising an army of bagholders to defend his ego.
If FAANG was a fever dream, this is a fever nightmare with a ticker symbol.
I have seen many retarded trades in my life, but buying this thing at IPO feels like volunteering to be farmed by a billionaire vampire in a Patagonia vest who thinks valuation is a personality trait.
\\Bull case:\\
\- $18.7B revenue, which sounds huge until you remember profits exist.
\- $1.7T valuation means the only thing greater than the number is the collective smooth-brain of the buyers.
\- Stonks only go up if enough regards confuse revenue with actual value.
\- Bagholders are the real product.
\\Bear case:\\
\- No profits.
\- Ten-figure overvaluation.
\- Founder is basically the final boss of bad vibes.
\- Retail gets rinsed faster than a federal indictment.
\\Position:\\
\- 0 shares.
\- 100% admiration from the sidelines.
\- Watching this thing with the same energy as a man standing outside a burning casino saying “maybe I should’ve played blackjack.”
\\TL;DR:\\
This IPO is not an investment, it’s a blood donation appointment with a $1.7T prospectus.
Regards,
Smooth brain analyst with a keyboard and a strong suspicion that this stock is going to crater like my calls.